How to Wake Up Early (NOT)

I am chronically running late.  Part of this is because I value time and cut things close.  Who wants to waste time waiting around? The other part is because I just can't get the knack of waking up early. But I'm a pro at how to not wake up early, so I thought I'd share my wisdom:

1. Go to bed ridiculously late.
2. Plan to go to bed early.  Still end up going to be ridiculously late.
3. Have the blinds within reach of your bed so you can open the window and be stimulated by the natural sunlight. But stay in bed with your eyes closed anyway.
4. Set an alarm. Have at least 10 "snoozes" set.  Because we all know that we just fall right back asleep after that fifth one goes off.
5. Have an INORDINATELY comfortable bed. Preferably with satin sheets/comforter and extra pillows.
6. Have good intentions about getting up early the next day.


And there you have it!  You will never wake up early again.

Where I like to spend my mornings. I like how my lamp is completely dissolved into what looks like the beginning of a fire insurance lawsuit.

I think it runs in the family.